Alone time

September 14, 2014 at 12:57 pm Leave a comment

I was reading Oprah’s magazine this morning, while the little man was golfing, and her end feature, “What I Know for Sure” was about her enjoying alone time. Rings very true with me as I am a big fan of it as well. Why? There is something almost meditative about it. It’s calming. It’s restorative. It lets my mind wander. I find all of those things relaxing and rejuvenating.

One of my favorite times is when my house is clean, the laundry is done, and I’m home alone. I sit in my comfy chair and listen to the quiet and smile. The only noise is generally the refrigerator running (hmmm, why does it always seem to be running? Perhaps not a good thing.), but other than that, quiet. No TV, no music, no anything. I close my eyes and just sit and relish the moment. The little man, on the other hand, does not like quiet. When he’s home, the TV is almost always on. I tried to get him to watch TV in the basement, but he doesn’t like it down there, so I hear golf, auto racing, Bruce Willis movies, etc. My other half is a man who doesn’t care to be alone with his thoughts. And he’s not alone.

I read a study last month about how people are so used to being engaged, that we are no longer comfortable being alone with our thoughts. We watch TV, listen to the radio in the car, are constantly on our phones, or are wearing ear buds to let music fill our brains. Perhaps we are afraid of our thoughts or maybe there’s not much to think about, but the study mentioned that creativity is going by the wayside as a result.

What do I do when I’m alone? “Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!” to quote Napoleon Dynamite. Some days, it’s just cleaning. I might start a project or look at catalogs or read. It’s not that I’m just sitting doing nothing, which I do, but it’s the fact that if there’s noise, I’m making it. My mom gets it. She also appreciates alone time. I think it’s heredity. As a child, I do recall spending a lot of time alone, partly due to shyness, but mostly, because I was very good at entertaining myself. I could make something from nothing and spend hours playing with my creation.

A story my kids often tease me about is my joy from playing with a rock. I’m not talking about something you could hold in your hand, but a rock that stood about 2 feet tall and resided at the corner of our house. It had lots of indentations in it and I treated it like a kitchen. I would make food and serving utensils from berries, leaves, grass, twigs, whatever I could find. I would hang around it for hours just playing house. I wish I had taken a photo of it, but we moved from that house when I was eight and I didn’t have a camera. I wonder if it’s still there?

Do kids today still get chances to use their imagination? Are they so wired to technology or organized activities that they never have alone time? Do they even like being alone? Many adults, including the little man (I was gone for two weeks recently and I think he had an anxiety attack that put him in the hospital for observation on the day I left). If you don’t like being alone, stretch yourself by trying it. Sit in a quiet spot and listen to your thoughts. If you do have a thing for alone time, then, you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s an “ahhhh” moment.

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